


La La Found You (At Last)

by unagidragonroll



Category: Produce 101 (TV), VICTON (Band)
Genre: Byungchan’s stupid excuses, Co-workers, Eventual Fluff, Exes, It’s 2020 seungchan rise, M/M, Pining, Slow Burn, i need to do something about this drought, mentions of pdx members, seungwoo is pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:42:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22117312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unagidragonroll/pseuds/unagidragonroll
Summary: Seungwoo doesn’t mind the universe’s play (or Byungchan’s, in this case).
Relationships: Choi Byungchan/Han Seungwoo
Comments: 2
Kudos: 44





	La La Found You (At Last)

**Author's Note:**

> All Seungwoo’s demons run wild but he contains it well, not until the demon presents itself in room.
> 
> Niki-ssi, you’ve served well. Yes, I’ll work hard on titles later.

Seungwoo sighs as he looks up at the sound of someone walks in for the umpteenth time that night, to find the guy who’s wearing a purple hoodie is not the one he’s been waiting for.

It’s almost predictable — everything that is happening now, and knowing Seungwoo, he already planned to walk out this cafe, not forgetting to smile at the waiter who’s been keeping an eye of him (he notices a lot of things), and drive back home to his untouched meeting materials that is due tomorrow.

(He’s been ignoring Seungsik’s calls for that matter.)

Said waiter suddenly comes and puts a croissant before him. He looks up, questioning.

“It’s on the house,” the waiter rubs the back of his neck. Seeing Seungwoo stays still on his seat, he quickly adds, “If— if you don’t like croissant I think we still have some chocolates left.. or strawberry cakes, maybe? You don’t seem to be the type of carrot cakes though..”

Seungwoo laughs at that, waving his hand dismissively, “No, no. It’s not that.” He chuckles again, “You’re right, I don’t really eat croissants but I’m sure my friend will like it.”

The waiter instantly beams, “Ah, the one you’ve been waiting for that you’ve been looking up every time any guest walks in?”

Seungwoo turns red for that.

“A date?” He asks.

“Used to,” he hums, “Hopefully.”

The waiter smiles, “Well, I’m not praying for the worst but if she ever didn’t show up, you can always come here and ask for another cup of americano.”

The seated one looks up to the other, smiling genuinely, “Thank you.”

He eventually leaves after a bit more of information exchanges, leaving Seungwoo by himself with his already empty cup of americano. It’s been 2 hours already, and the other guests are already preparing for their leaves.

Seungwoo thinks a lot, and moments like these, when he’s not around him, not nagging him about his unnecessarily too much americano consumption, not complaining about his lack of sleep, are definitely what’s been keeping him inside that small cafe at the corner of the street.

He knows, when they accidentally met at the grocery store, and a week after that at his office (yes he’s apparently the new kid Jinhyuk’s been talking about), and countless times at the lift, at the pantry, even at Sungwoon’s bachelor party last Spring, he knows that it’s bound to happen. Or at least, since Seungwoo knows he can’t hope that much, he knows he’s given another chance by the universe to do something about it.

And he’s not going to waste it.

Maybe it’s too obvious to some, that Seungwoo tends to hang around at Jinhyuk’s floor for the past few months when it used to be Jinhyuk calling him 10 times before he came straight to the restaurant they agreed to have lunch at, that Seungwoo (though he refuses to admit) brushes his hair back that his forehead shows more often, that Seungwoo joins the Marketing Team night outs at nearby bar or at that karaoke room that would take him two times longer to reach his apartment, that apparently, Seungwoo’s heart does the oh so familiar beat when the new kid who’s seated at the cubicle next to Wooseok looks up and locks eyes with him when he finds out the tuna sandwich he had put this morning.

He mouths, “Thank you,” which Seungwoo replies by mirroring his smile.

Seungwoo can’t help it, he wants to see that smile more often than their sleepy morning greetings at the lift, that laugh when he stupidly adds salt to his coffee instead of sugar, those tipsy high-pitched singing during their karaoke night outs or even that tacky grinding with Wooseok on top of the club table. More importantly, he wants to see him to be his again.

It’s not Seungwoo’s fault that he’s kind of greedy for more. He’s been used to bring two portions at once during lunch breaks, he’s been used to a glass of strawberry juice on top of his table every Thursday (“I know. Tech meeting. Throw your fourth coffee for this, please?”), and he’s been used to drive a drunk 185cm guy home that he always rejects said tall guy’s soju offers then settles for beers. 

“Hyung,” he once slurred on his sleep when he’s being put gently on his own bed one night, all face red yet hand gently grasped his wrist preventing his leave, “Hyung, am I allowed to like you this time? Is it okay, now?”

Seungwoo almost applauded himself for not kissing the hell out of him right there and then.

But every time, every time Seungwoo has gathered all the courage to ask for a dinner (without Jinhyuk) or simply to drive a sober-him to their office after-hours, somehow he manages to chicken out and make lame excuses like, “I left my phone— no battery— phone. Upstairs. I think I might have to wait for it to be fully charged and go there by bus,” or even lamer, “I promised Jinhyuk to not leave him on every single Subway that I eat throughout my life.”

Yes, Seungwoo is even stupider for taking those excuses.

The thing is, they dated long way back then during his second year of university, and freshmen year for the younger. Long short story, they separated after two years and a half. Seungwoo went away to pursue his master degree overseas and things just didn’t work out that way.

Seungwoo realizes, that if he wanted to do this with the him again, he doesn’t want it to end the same way like it did. Therefore, he promised himself, and if he lets him, he’d promise that he’ll work his hardest on his part to make this work. 

It’ll work, this time.

He looks down to his phone, still, no notification about his whereabout.

“Uh, hey,” Seungwoo looks up, it’s the same waiter as before. He looked apologetic and Seungwoo nods, still smiling. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he takes the croissant from earlier, “Can I have a box for this, please?”

“Sure,” he takes the bread away back to the counter. That way Seungwoo realizes the cafe is already closed. He stands up too, gathering his keys and his coat.

He takes one last look at the strawberry smoothie in front of him, still full, then decides to just bring it with him too. Definitely a good companion for the croissant.

After thanking the remaining waiters (also apologizing for making them stay longer than the closing hour), he heaves a big sigh once he steps outside and feels the winter wind grazes his knit cardigan.

He looks up, neither the moon is apparent nor the snow is falling. It’s just cold, the typical early January weather, and Seungwoo just wants to go under his warm blanket and sleep this night away.

He doesn’t even have the will to work his unfinished proposal for tomorrow meeting, hell, even he’s been thinking about taking the day off. He deserved it the least after a perfect attendance on the second half of 2019, right?

Taking out a box of cigarette that has been inside his bag for quite some time, he takes out a stick and let it burn his throat. It feels so familiar, the impending cough, the weird feeling inside his chest, and also the absence of his presence.

Just like the old time.

It doesn’t take him long to reach his apartment. The road is much clearer since it’s late, and Seungwoo barely hit the brake the whole time. By the time he reached his floor, there’s only one cigarette left being tucked between his cold lips. 

“I thought I told you I don’t like seeing you smoke,” a voice suddenly calls before him.

Seungwoo freezes, afraid to look up to find no one that he’s hallucinating.

But no, a pair of familiar old skool vans appears before his eyes on the ground, just few meters from him, and the familiar peach scent. That damned peach scent that fazes him he doesn’t realize the stick between his lips is long gone.

“What are you doing here?” Seungwoo widens his own eyes as he realized it sounded too harsh and he really didn’t mean it. “Uh, I mean— sorry. It’s late.”

The other’s expression softens, “Yeah, it’s late. Can I come in?”

Seungwoo blinks for a few times as he faces his door. “Sure.”

It’s not until Seungwoo turns after the kitchen to light on the living room that he begins to hear him speak.

“I’m sorry,” he says, sounded like he still stands before the door. “I was afraid.”

Seungwoo retreats his hand back from the light switch. He sighs, tightening the grip on the paper bag.

“I have croissant if you’re hungry,” he suggests.

“I am hungry,” he mumbles.

“Good,” Seungwoo proceeds to turn the light on at last, putting the glass on the kitchen table too. “Strawberry smoothie, too.”

“My favorite,” he mumbles again, still not moving on his feet.

Seungwoo puts his coat on the sofa and takes off his grey cardigan. Really, he doesn’t expect this night would turn like this. Maybe he said that he’s ready to start again, with him, by putting his ego aside and start anew. But apparently he’s not the bigger person here, not before, not now, and maybe, he’s still not ready when the person he’s been pining for months, hell, he hadn’t even move on for years, stands before him, probably cold from waiting too long outside of his apartment, and the worst thing is, he’s ready for him again.

“Hyung,” he calls, feet shifting against his parquet floor. Seungwoo can feel his heart beating faster as he can feel him nearer this time. He stops, just few meters behind him. “Hyung, can— can you look at me?”

Weakly, he turns on his heels. It’s true; For the love of Buddha, Seungwoo really wants to wrap him warm and make him hot chocolate so the shivering could stop.

“Seungwoo hyung,” he calls again.

“How could you wear this on this weather?” Seungwoo asks, gesturing to his denim jacket and white thin t-shirt underneath it. He’s not even wearing a thick track pants! His tone is not menacing, the younger knows that too. Seungwoo sighs again whilst shakes his head, “Aren’t you cold?”

“Of course,” he answers, a smile finds its way to his slightly trembling lips, “But you’re colder.”

Seungwoo chuckles in disbelief. “Really? Now if I may ask, who made me wait at the cafe for three hours without any notice?” The younger’s shoulder shakes as he laughs. “You could at least tell me if Jinhyuk suddenly asked you to the Subway, or borrow Yuvin’s phone charge if you left yours at home, again.”

At that the younger’s laugh toned down. His gaze lingers lower, “You’re mad.”

“Remind me that one time, any time, if I ever gone mad at your lame excuse,” he says, “Have I, Byungchan?”

The younger smiles meekly. He looks up again and finds Seungwoo’s eyes. “I’m sorry, hyung. Said I was afraid.”

Seungwoo bits his lower lip and after a pause searching the younger’s eyes, he replies, “I am too.”

Then there goes Byungchan’s rambles: “I— I thought I was ready, for you, again. I don’t know, hyung, I like you. Of course I do. I like you even when you don’t push your bangs back, you know your forehead kills, right? I thought that if I had to die I wanted to die that morning you rolled your sleeve up to your elbow. I’ve witnessed the world’s fineness. I hate it when the interns linger at your desk after every meeting, I don’t like the girls who offered you drinks at the bar. I mean, isn’t it obvious that you like beers not tequilas? You even drove and they all knew. I think they purposely made you drunk so that they can bring you to bed. Thank Goodness you refused them. Speaking about self control, huh?”

Seungwoo knows he’s been staring with adoration but he could care less now.

“Those lame excuses that you said, yes I admit my defeat. I mean, you know how bad I am with lying yet you keep on pushing me to do it! God, I still think about the day I told you Wooseok had asked me to eat chicken feet with him before you asked me to try the new milk tea shop. It still haunts me, you know, hyung?”

That night, Seungwoo prayed Wooseok didn’t shove chicken feets into Byungchan’s throat because the glow in Wooseok’s face when Byungchan said that, it was almost scary. 

Byungchan pouts after taking few breath, “I like you a lot, hyung. Heck, even Sejin from Finance knows that and we barely talk.”

“Wait, I thought you’re close with Sejin?” Seungwoo asks. 

“Huh?” Byungchan scratches his head, “Well, technically, I am. We are. We hang out a lot.”

“Yes, you ditched me once for him.” Seungwoo adds again.

“Soooorry, hyung!” Byungchan whines, rubbing his hands together, “I promised him to shop for Seungyoun’s surprise party since the month before.”

Seungwoo holds back his laugh. “See? You’re close with him.”

“Well— you know, it doesn’t matter!” Byungchan narrows his eyes and pokes the older’s side, “God, you were just messing with me!”

Seungwoo jumps, “Wait, hey! Don’t— you know I’m ticklish!”

Byungchan laughs as he keeps on poking Seungwoo’s waist, until Seungwoo’s grips on his wrist firm and he brings him to his arm. Back again, on the arm he longs so much. The younger hiccups as a response.

Seungwoo beams, inhaling the peach scent that in this proximity, is being mixed with the smell of fresh laundry and his shampoo. “You don’t change your shampoo.”

Byungchan, hands still limp besides him, manages to nod, “Uh, yeah. It helps the bleaching and all. And it’s smoothing. You know my scalps. So.”

Seungwoo nods in response, then he pulls away but takes Byungchan’s cold fingers into his, intertwining them in hope that it will bring him warmth. He looks straight at his orbs, “Byungchan, I’m sorry.”

“What—“

“I’m sorry, that even years after that, I still upset you.” He smiles a bit, though sadly, “I haven’t even properly apologize to you for what happened to us back then. I was a jerk, maybe I still am, for making you feel this way. Up until now.”

“Hyung, it was my fault too, though.”

Seungwoo grazes his thumb over his hand, “Maybe, it was our fault it didn’t work out, but I was at fault for letting you go, for not making you feel at ease, not after there were miles apart us and those nights I left you on read. Just to simply hear your voice, that I knew back then when I already lost you, how bad I wanted it to be back. Stupid, huh?”

Byungchan smiles, looking down at their intertwined fingers. “It was hard, hyung.”

“I know, I’m sorry. And millions of sorry won’t cover it, I know.” Seungwoo tightens the grips, “Even today, when you didn’t show up for the nth time every time I ask you out, I thought that maybe I don’t deserve you. Maybe the universe’s still punishing me for what I’ve done, and maybe you’ve moved on, for good.” He chuckles again, still trying to talk to his eyes. “I— I’m not ready yet. It was hard on me too, and the blaming myself part itself is the hardest part. Yes, Byungchan, I was stupid, again, for not reaching out to you back then. I let us go downslide. A dead end, even. But I thought if I ever wanted to go back with you, I should be a better version, the best one if possible. That way, probably, just maybe, I could feel like I deserve someone like you.”

Byungchan scoffs. Definitely not what Seungwoo expected.

“Chan..?”

“Yes, you said that millions time that you’re stupid, but I can’t believe the man I’ve been in love for years is this stupid.” Byungchan grumbles, more to himself, as he retreats his hand from the older to wipe his left cheek. He looks up to face Seungwoo, face red and another tear rolls down his face, “You’re so stupid, hyung.”

“Yeah, I am,” Seungwoo weakly answers, slowly reaching out to caress the younger’s cheek. “Minutes ago, I was still contemplating whether to ask for you to go home because I’m— I’m afraid and I’m not ready, yet, I can tell you that I’m now here with all I have. And I— I’m sorry, for being greedy. But I want this, I want you, so much.”

Byungchan groans, “God, hyung, you’re lucky you bribed me with croissant and strawberry smoothie before you said those cheesy stuffs. I loved you before because you’re healthy, less grease, you know?”

Seungwoo’s smile finds its way again to his lips, “The croissant’s all cold now, but I have microwave?”

The younger laughs, his dimples showed, his eyes turning into crescents, and Seungwoo swears nothing even the brand new warmer inside his apartment could beat the warmth the younger radiates through his lips when he brings him closer, the way he opens his mouth as Seungwoo gladly claims his lower lip again as his, and the way his eyes glinted after they pull away, staring straight into his blurred ones.

Seungwoo caresses his cheek again, he will never get tired of those cheeks. “I know I’ve messed up before, and I said I’m not ready yet, but if you let me, please, let me, make you happy and I promise you I’ll work hard on my part this time so we will work out.” He leans in to pecks his lips, “I’m not forcing you or anything but,” he pecks his lips once again, “You know the rest. I love you, Byungchan.”

The younger, again, scoffs, and even has the audacity to rolls his eyes that caused another tear to roll down. “Not forcing me, my ass. Just kiss me again then heat my croissant for me. After that, I will tell you my answer.”

Seungwoo grins, gladly complying orders. “As you wish.”

That perhaps, the universe wants them to try again. And it doesn’t matter if Byungchan changes his second and third Thursday coffees into carrot juices, or Seungwoo got promoted that makes him travel abroad way more often than their Netflix nights, or both of them are too tired to wait on each other, have dinner together, and simply talk about their days after weeks of curt good mornings and good nights — as long as they still work on their parts, both believe the universe is still on their side.

“I love you,” Byungchan whispers once he looks up and sees Seungwoo’s sleeping face. He slept early after he went back from the MT the Marketing Team had in celebration of their half-year record. He even didn’t check his phone for Seungwoo’s message, the last one was during lunch when he told him about his delayed flight. He was a bit surprised too, albeit not knowing the exact time, that he manages to come home early enough to sleep with him before the sun rises. He was in the middle of counting his steady heart rate, and observing the way the older’s mouth opened slightly whenever he’s fast asleep whilst his arms occasionally tightens around his slender waist, that his mouth works on its own and say those words. Byungchan blinks, still surprised of his own tongue but more to Seungwoo’s tiredly opened eyes. “Sorry, did I wake you?”

Seungwoo leans in to Byungchan’s warm hand on his cheek. Seemed hard for him to open his eyes fully, but when he does, he looks straight at the younger who’s now wide awake, heart thumping against his ribcage. Seungwoo smiles and hoarsely manages to say, “Took you hundreds of croissant to answer that. Thank you.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic after a year (!!!) and yes, I’ve managed to get myself into PDX too (God please help my boys X1) and this is my January entry for the Twitter project #seungchanbahagia2020. Yes, please, Seungchan, be happy amongst those angsty fics.


End file.
